Conversation Planner

Helps a member prepare one important conversation (with a partner, child, co-parent, family member or school) so they know how to open, what to ask for and how to stay calm.

What you will need

Who is the conversation with? (text): Partner, child, teenager, co-parent, parent or elder, sibling, school, employer.
What is it about, in one line? (text): For example: money, a broken promise, school, screen time, intimacy, a loss.
Do you feel safe raising this with them? (yes/no/unsure): If you are afraid of how they will react, the planner will show safer options first.
How do you feel about it? (text): More detail. One or two words, like worried, hurt, tired.
What happens that affects you? (text): More detail. Describe what happens, not their character.
What would you like to happen? (text): More detail. One clear, doable request.
When and where could you talk calmly? (text): More detail. Not in bed, while driving or in front of others.
If it is a child, how old are they? (years): More detail. Adjusts the wording to their age.

How it works

IF safe_to_talk == 'no' OR topic mentions violence/threats/forced sex: do NOT build a confrontation script; show safety panel (GBV Command Centre 0800 428 428, SAPS 10111) and offer the emotional abuse article and a counsellor callback. IF who in (child, teenager) AND topic mentions suicide/self-harm/dying: show the depressed-teen guidance with the direct question 'Are you thinking about ending your life?' and the Suicide Crisis Helpline 0800 567 567. ELSE build script: opener = 'I would like to talk about ' + topic + '. Is now a good time?'; i_statement = 'I feel ' + feeling + ' when ' + situation + ', and I would like ' + request + '.'; listen_prompt = 'How do you see it?' then reflect back 'So what you are saying is ...'; time_out = 'If either of us gets upset, we will stop for 20 to 30 minutes and come back to this by [agreed time].'; close = agree one next step and a check-in date. IF who == child: simplify to short sentences and swap i_statement for 'I noticed ... I am here for you. Can you tell me more?' with wording scaled to child_age (under 7: one sentence, offer drawing or play; 7-12: simple questions; 13+: side-by-side talk suggestion). IF who == parent_or_elder: add a respectful opening that acknowledges their role before the request.

What you get

Your conversation plan
Before you start checklist
Safety options (shown only if needed)

What it means

Your safety comes first, so talk to a counsellor or the GBV Command Centre before raising this.
Conversations go better with one clear request, so try naming one small thing you would like.
You have a clear plan: keep it short, listen as much as you speak, and it is fine to pause and come back.

Next step: Want help interpreting this? Talk it through with a counsellor through the Cleared Mind 24-hour Careline on 0800 212 146.

Runs on the device. Nothing is saved unless the member chooses.